12.03.2000

...and on blustery cold nights like tonight, i can't help but think how warm i'd be curled up in his arms. even if he has no emotion behind it, when he holds me and gingerly kisses my hair i can pretend that he does. i think of him so often, that i can smell him. i can concentrate and float into the time when we were close, breathe in deeply, and smell him. my heart aches for the day when i can bury my head in his sweater and breathe deeply and smell him for real.

countdown to the big move: 34 days