i'm moving to portland in sixteen days and he's going to let me go. he's going to let me get on a plane and move three thousand miles away without saying good-bye. for the past year, i've constantly set myself up for disappointment with him. this is the final blow. i told myself that this is the last time i put myself out there for him and after that i'm moving on and not looking back.

but god...no one said how hard it would be.